Tachenon.5270

This came to me in a dream last night. Actually, it was in that semi-lucid semi-waking state one sometimes enters after one's cat emits a tremendously raucous 'get up and feed me you lazy bum!' at 3 AM kind of meow. Anyway. New tier of armor/weapons/trinkets. Absurdium gear! As with Legendary gear, you pick the stats, but NOT from the pre-existing attribute combos! Instead, you get an allotments of stat points you can distribute to any combination of stats. Like, say, 147 points. Put em all in one stat! Split em between two! Etc. In whatever ratio you desire. Of course attaining gear this absurd should be absurdly easy and casual, so it should only take like 10,001 of every gather-able material in the game that must be acquired by equally absurd gathering tools (earned by gathering 100,001 of every gather-able material the old fashioned way for each gathering tool, with the count starting when one unlocks the associated achievement or whatever) and you can only make one piece of Absurdium gear every two years. That should make it easily attainable by even the most casual hyper-casual player at some point within their lifespan. So. You're welcome!

Well, in that regard, all I ever really wanted was a pony. Well. Like a clydesdale, percheron, suffolk punch, or shire, ah, pony. You get the idea. Instead we got 🐰. But they're cool. Still want a pony, though.

I want it all and I want it now! /e freddie I want more races and professions and new stories that introduce them. I want characters who enter the game AFTER the End of Dragons with a whole new personal story to experience. I want to see where that portal in Brisban Wildlands goes. I want to see the Dominion of Winds. I want to go to that place where Rotscale used to hang out in the old game. I want polymock. Stuff that the naysayers here will all say nay to but would embrace 100% if we got it. Like, ah... *cough* mounts *cough* Also I would kinda like it if confused emojis were available as minipets.

On a GW2 classic server the cows in Queensdale would miss out on all that entertainment.

Excuses: none! Retroactive Armor: hide it! Like head gear and gloves (and footwear if you're incredibly lucky or rich). It's there, you just can't see it. Which should have been (and still could be, if they cared) done for charr anyway. Furry critters running around in clothes. Like (ugh) humans! Aiee! Probably sylvari, too. Surely they would just grow their own. Armor, clothes, what have you. But I digress. Lore: invasive species. Same as humans. Lizzid People: shout out to Hecklefish!

Thanks! This one's giving me a lot of trouble. I've only got to the 5th flag so far. If colorful metaphors were pennies, I'd be rich!

In Skywatch Archipelago, the Soaring Aerie, there's a pillar with a sparkly circle on top. Land there and another sparkly circle appears nearby with an orange flag icon. Land there, and another appears, etc. If you're too slow, the thing vanishes. What the heck are these things? I mean, is there a name for this, uh, activity? I've seen them in EoD as well.

I'd like Virtuoso, if not for the floating pink daggers of doom. Not as bad as the original Untamed effect, but kitten. Still, I did finally manage to get over the Herald's wacky Legendary Dragon Stance ground effect graphics that look (to me) like some kinda fancy snow sled thing. Ugh. But anyway. Maybe I will eventually learn to embrace the daggers. I'd like it better, though, if the daggers were, I dunno, pretty pink hearts or something. Orange stars. Yellow moons. Green clovers. Or maybe bunnies.

The game needs more cows. As ranger pets. Minis and NPCs. Mounts! Guild Hall decorations. Home instance inhabitants (like all those cats). Cow-themed outfits, armors, and weapons (especially a warhorn that goes MOOOO). Emotes. There should be a Cow Lodge in Hoelbrak. Cow bobble heads in that damned box o' fun thing. A Relic of the Bos Taurus that summons a Herd of Cows to stampede over enemies. A jump puzzle in which we are transformed into cows and must jump over the moon! Cow Dancing Adventures. Craftable items to cleanse any and all varieties of barnyard/pasture stinkiness. Cows, I tell you. Cows. And opossums.

Live and learn, I guess. I'll just ignore them from now on.

Hadn't really delved into this prior to today, but today I happened upon a T3 rift event. Myself and another player cleared out the lesser kryptis thingees. Couldn't lure anything out of the rift, though, because we didn't have any 'rare' motivations. Called it out in map chat. A handful of people eventually showed up. Nobody had any rare motivations. I hit the wiki for more info. Craft this first, then that, then the other, etc. Shared that info. Reactions were pretty much 'lol wut'. Meanwhile, I looked up the cost of a rare motivation on the TP. 7 gold, 31 silver at that time. Shared that info. Again, 'lol wut'. After a while I gave up on it and logged out. No idea if anyone ever showed up with a rare motivation. As for my personal motivation in regard to this 'content', yeah, ain't got any. I'll offer this suggestion for a better way to lure kryptis out of their rifts: how about we herd a bunch of cows to the rifts and dance to entertain them. This will either confuse the kryptis bosses so much they will 'come on down' for a better look, or flee in sheer terror. Win/win. Moo.

When it all grinds to a halt And all pathways lead to salt One could argue who's at fault Or circle back and make an alt!

So, you're saying anet SUBTRACTED fun from the game. 100% agreement! It has, sadly, become their way. As for the heroes/henchies. I wish they were still here. They were a fun add on, too. Why, I remember back in the day when my guildies and I kept failing some mission or other, something in Nightfall, I think. We decided to take a lunch break. While everyone else was chowing down, I called upon my trusty heroes/henchies and did the kitten mission. Boom. /e Archie and Edith -- Those were the days.

Had this happen 09/10/2023 just a little before 1:49 PM EST in the vicinity of the Veteran Magic-Muddled Djinn Hero challenge in Crystal Oasis. While fighting the congregation of critters in that area I noticed my Untamed ranger's smokescale pet was missing and wouldn't come back, even when out of combat. The pet management window was blank, no pets selected in any of the four slots. I have screenshots, would love to post them here like we could back in the old days, but alas. In a screenshot taken shortly thereafter near the Amnoon waypoint the smokescale was back, but I don't remember what I did to get it back. It was actually kind of neat. Petless ranger, at last!

Yesterday I was goofing around with my seldom-played Untamed norn dude, tracking down pets to charm, and I happened upon the champion karka hive defender event in Southsun. I figured what the heck and jumped in -- only to discover I was all the only player there! Woops. And then it dawned on me that, hey, my guy wasn't dying. He was actually whittling that champ down and he wasn't dying. Well, he did get downed once, but ultimately he triumphed. And I was all like, well doggies. How about that! And then later he was in Cantha and some elite aetherblade bandit handed him his champ-soloing behind in a picnic basket. Along with a box of barefoot pinot grigio. So, I guess the moral of this story is, one champ's power creep is another elite's uh, scruffy-looking nerf herder. Or something. Or maybe it works both ways. I dunno. Stupid aetherblades.

Faces! It's charr necks that would draw chiropractors from all over Tyria to the Black Citadel! If Tyria had chiropractors, that is. Which it surely does, considering how many charr there are, and every single one with a charr neck! If Tyria doesn't have any native chiropractors, it's a thousand wonders that's not what's coming out of all the rifts -- 'Charropractors' . . . from the Mists! 💲

Had no idea there was a dot or a line until I saw this thread. But that dot isn't a dot . . . it's a MICROdot!

They should add fishing rifts! Find a rift, cast a line... ba dum... ba Dum... Ba DUM... BA DUM BA DUM BA DUM (etc) "You're gonna need a bigger rift."

Indeed. The glory of creation is in its infinite diversity and the ways our differences combine to create meaning and beauty. Live long and prosper. 🖖

I felt (and still feel) like every dragon after Zhaitan was 'recycled contents'. I remember saying way back when that our shining example of defeating that rascal should have inspired people around Tyria to rise up and do the same with whatever dragon was bothering them. So we could move on to something fresh and exciting in a whole new campaign. Instead we got "I slew a dragon. I slew a dragon again. Hey!" Etc Etc. I dunno. So far I'm having fun, in spite of some of the more, ah, 'shiny' aspects of SoTO.

I have a theory: this is the work of the kryptis! It's a profoundly evil and insidious form of CC designed to keep us from reaching our objective in a timely and efficient manner. It also made me proclaim my displeasure via an assortment of colorful metaphors, every time I encountered it. Constructive feedback: take it back! Uh, I mean, maybe give those of us unable to fully appreciate this mastery a toggle so that we are not continually blinded by the overwhelming brilliance of its execution. Thank in advance! This is what it feels like:

I got the Gift of Battle today (along with a 3rd piece of stat-selectable armor) and now I has a Starter Kit Bolt! I'd run around bling blinging with it but I need to unwind from all that intense WvW so I think I'll relax for a while and maybe make another pizza sandwich. With extra pepperoni. Yeah.

I'm gonna bind it to the U key. Because. . . (young folks won't get it but it's too good to pass up) . . . I Want U To Show Me The Way!

I got a third of the way through the Gift of Battle track yesterday. Would have got farther, but I finished up the previously selected track first. Some kinda armor thing, I forget. Anyway. SOON(tm) I will have my first legendary, and one of my guys can leave silly foot steps all over the place. Too bad they don't persist permanently. Bling! PS: also got two pieces of stat-selectable exotic armor. Woo.

Player: Are you gonna solo this? Other player: I'm not gonna solo it. You solo it! Player: I'm not gonna solo it. Other Player: Let's get Hizen! Player: Yeah! Other player: He'll solo it. He solos everything! Hizen: (solos it while eating cereal) Both players: He soloed it! Hey, Hizen!