The beauty of mounts in gw2 is that they're for a specific purpose, You also don't pick the skyscale for it's swimming ability
or the jackal for it's flying ability...
Do you want a giant turtle to zoom as fast as a rollerbeetle past you?
How is this a LOL, it's been known since it was announced and it's pretty much a selling-feature.
Now it's just feeling like a copy-paste troll post honestly.
If you hate EoD that much just don't buy the expansion, nobody would enjoy reading the map chat all filled up with this whining by people like you that are this pre-determined to hate on everything anyway. There's tons of people that do like the sound of EoD and they're likely gonna enjoy it regardless of how hard you whine here.